Marienne: "I Was Made To Know God" // "我是為了認識神而活"

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My life has a purpose and a goal – knowing Jesus for who He truly is. 我的生命有一個目的和目標 去真真正正地認識耶和華。

God is an infinite God. He measured the waters in the hollow of His hand, measured the heavens with the span of His hand, held the dust of the earth in a basket and actually weighed the mountains on the scales and the hills in a balance (Is. 40:12).  He has no beginning and no end (Rev. 1:8).

Yet, this very God beckons me to know Him; His heart, His ways, His emotions, His will – everything about Him. He loves revealing Himself even through creation (Rom. 1:20) as they speak of His reality. When I was younger, I used to think that I had to figure Him out in my own strength, or I could only get to know Him through sermons and teachings. As I grew older, I grew more desperate for the truth. I knew there was so much more than conferences, church on Sundays and ministry work. The cry of my heart was, “I need to know this God to whom I confess my love and my vows.” because I couldn’t live my life any longer in God through what others figured out or just observe from a distance.

Christianity is a relationship with the living God: you can’t love someone you barely know. That simple revelation compelled me to go deeper in Him, seeking and finding the riches, the everlasting, overflowing joy in knowing Him. With God, there is no end to knowing Him – He’s infinite - He releases new revelation about Him every single day! He fascinates my heart; every time I think I’ve figured Him all out, He surprises me and reveals another facet of His personality, as I wait on Him. Still my prayer is that I would never fall into complacency or be overly familiar with His ways, but ask that even the simplest, most basic revelation would excite my heart.

In this journey with God, I find comfort in the fact that He answers; He has promised that He would – even the great and unsearchable things I do not know (Jer. 33:3, Matt. 7:7, Luke 11:9). It may take time, but He’s not slow in fulfilling His promises (2 Pet. 3:9).

My life has a purpose and a goal – knowing Jesus for who He truly is. Not the Jesus of the porcelain Nativity scene figurines, nor the sugarcoated Jesus who makes all things nice and rosy, nor the Jesus who is bitter and distant. I was made to know this very real God who has captured my heart and who has called me to a life of knowing Him. To count ALL things – all my achievements, gains, profits in life – a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Him (Phil. 3:8). I know I was made to know Him as much as I can and get as close as I can get. It’s impossible to know Him completely (Phil. 3:12), but it is such a worthy pursuit for which I would gladly, joyfully give my life – my strongest and my weakest years.

I was made to know God.  Just as we all were.

神是一個無限的神。祂用手心量諸水,用手虎口量蒼天,用升斗盛大地的塵土,用秤稱山嶺,用天平平岡陵(以賽亞書40:12)。祂沒有開始,也沒有終結(啓示錄1:8)。

然而,這神召喚我去認識祂;祂的心、祂的道、祂的感情、祂的旨意-關於祂的一切。當他們談及祂的真實,祂愛透過祂所創造的萬物揭示自己(羅馬書1:20)。年少時的我總以為我須要單靠自己的力量去理解祂,或者我只能從講道和查經裡認識祂。當我慢慢長大,我變得更渴望得到真相。我知道除了聚會、主日禮拜和事工外,還有更多更多。我的心呼叫著:“我須要認識供應我的愛和誓約的這個神。”因為我不能再繼續透過別人理解的神或從旁觀察而去活在神當中。

基督教和活著的上帝的一段關係:你不能愛一位你不太認識的人物。這簡單的啟示迫使我更深入地認識祂、尋找因認識祂而得到的財富和永恆並滿瀉的喜悅。認識主是無盡頭的-祂是無限的-祂每一天都發放關於祂的新啟示!祂吸引著我的心;每當我以為我已經了解祂的時候,祂總會在我服侍神時給我驚喜並為我揭示祂的個性的另一面。我的禱告一直是祈求神不要讓我太自滿或對祂的道過度熟悉,並且祈求連最簡單、最基本的啟示也會讓我的心感到鼓舞。

在這段與神的旅途上,我因祂的回應而感到安慰;祂承諾祂會回應-包括我所不知道、又大又難的事(耶利米書33:3,馬太福音7:7,路加福音11:9)。這可能要等上一點時間,但是神是不會耽誤成就祂的應許(彼得後書3:9)。

我的生命有一個目的和目標 - 去真真正正地認識耶和華。不是那位耶和華誕生一幕裡的瓷器塑像,不是那位被美化成能把所有事都變得美好的耶和華,也不是那位悲酸和遙遠的耶和華。我是為了認識這俘虜了我的心以及呼召我用一輩子去認識祂的神而活的。我將萬事 - 我人生裡所有的成就、得著和利益 - 當作損失,因我以認識祂為至寶(腓利比書3:8)。我知道我是為了盡我能力去認識祂並盡量拉近跟神的距離而活的。完完全全地認識祂是沒有可能的(腓利比書3:12),但這是一場很值得我樂意地、歡欣地付出我一生(包括我最強和最弱的那些年頭)的追求。

我是為了認識神而活的。就如我們大家都是。

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